Onboard Moya, Sunday Fandom Time

[stykera]

It was there last day on Moya, for now, and Stark was giving Summer a more thorough tour of the ship which was ending now. They'd gone back to Pilot's Den, looked in the maintenance bay, seen some of the nearly invisible scars from the fire (and Stark had stood silently for a long moment with his hand on Moya's bulkhead there), and now they had reached the final planned location.

"This is my favorite place on the ship," he said as they stopped outside a door. "It's...you'll see. A very good place to just sit. It's beautiful and it's quiet and none of us come here very often. It's peaceful. Should we go in?"

That was the whole point of being outside this particular door, but Stark was still Stark. He was nervous even if this trip had gone better than he ever could have hoped.

[For Stark's very favorite person, NFB for distance, there are no laws preventing calls and texts because that would be really weird]

Comments

[stykera]

"It can be hard to let yourself grieve."

Stark sighed softly. "Although sometimes it's harder to let yourself stop. Or maybe that's just me." He did have a tendency to feel too deeply and get lost in those feelings. The last time he'd been onboard this ship it had been because he needed a reason to stop feeling hurt and loss and nothing else.

"And yes. I do know. There are plenty of people I've known who've disappeared from my life for any number of reasons and some of them may be fine and others...I'll never really know, even if I'm almost entirely certain. But we're talking about you."

Stark being a disaster was a given. Although right now he was calm and he was here, keeping his arms around the most important person in his world and gently toying with her hair now.

"Do you want to tell me about them?"

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Well, I guess that does make me feel a little better," Summer murmured, "if even you don't even know sometimes, and that's, like, your whole deal."

Yes, she knew it didn't work like that. Not the point.

"Did you ever know Kanan?" she then asked, with no small amount of hesitation. "Jarrus? I feel like I may have asked before, but I don't remember."

[stykera]

"I wish I knew more than I do. It would help," Stark said softly. "And...no. I'm sorry. I only know his name. We never met that I recall."

Maybe that would make it harder to talk about him. Maybe it would be easier.

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Well," Summer nodded a little, "he was my best friend. Long before Annie and Rey and you. Not before Mr. Poopybutthole, but, I mean, he and I go way back. He was one of the first people I met when I came here, and he made me pancakes at Luke's almost every Sunday, and I always sent him a stupid amount of roses every Valentine's Day. I lived on his couch for a little while, and he's a good part of why I'm such a good fucking pilot. He taught me about the Force and the Jedi and was the whole reason I opened a space jello cantina in the first place. Hell,he's the reason for all the really weird jello right off the bad. Well, him and Steeeeeve, both. My office at the school used to be his office, and I made sure I snagged it because Sabine did a painting on the wall of when he was a Loth cat, and one time, he was a Loth cat the same time I was a squirrel and we raided a picnic together, and he was the only one who knew right away when my grampa replaced me with a robot."

That was the easy part to talk about. This next part? Not so much.

"And I miss him so fucking much every single day, Stark." Her voice wavered again. "I got portal blocked from his dimension after blowing up a part of Coruscant, so I couldn't even pop in every once in a while to check up on him. But I could at least tell myself, in my ignorance, that he was still doing well...

"But then Sabine came back, and she had that time-skip, and I just knew by the look on her face. We didn't talk about it, but I kinda feel we didn't need to.

[stykera]

"It's hard," Stark said, holding her a little tighter now and bending a bit so he could rest his head on hers. "It's hard to miss someone so much it hurts. But...he sounds like a good friend, Summer. An important one. I'm glad you had him and I am so sorry you've lost him."

He took a deep breath, gave an extra little squeeze, and continued. "I'd like to hear more, if you'll tell me. It doesn't have to be right now. Just sometime, if you like. Maybe you could show me photos? Or the painting in your office?"

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Calling him 'a good friend' is doing him a big disservice, Stark," Summer said, more than a little defensively, but, hey, cut her some slack. She was feeling pretty emotionally raw at the moment, and she needed Stark to understand the sheer magnitude of how much Kanan really did mean to her.

[stykera]

"I didn't mean to...to minimize anything," Stark told her quickly. "Not at all. Not my intent. I'm sorry."

He'd said something wrong already and he should have known better. He should be better a this.

"He sounds important," he said again. "I'm sorry I never had a chance to meet him."